When you are back in town, all sorts of strange things happen. Like you find out the car you crushed over in high school is still owned and loved by the same guy. That is good to know. I have had some odd feelings being here. Old memories but no attachment like it is home. We saw my cousin at… Read more »
My Aunt Mary and Grandma Puttick used to say “pish” all of the time. When I use it, most of the time I have to either get out a dictionary to prove that it is a word or listen to some arse say that it isn’t a word. Like taking elocution lessons from a guy named Bubba in his beat… Read more »
I have the strangest dreams. I don’t try to over analyze them. Hell, I don’t even try to analyze them. Some times they make me sad and some times they make me smile. Last night I had a dream that did both. I am a fangrrl when it comes to Hugh Laurie. I will watch the biggest bit of crap… Read more »
What we have once enjoyed we can never lose, All that we love deeply becomes a part of us. Helen Keller Yesterday would have been my mother’s 62nd birthday. She last held me over 7 years ago. The pain doesn’t go away. You learn to cope and make it through the days but it is always there. Almost looming. I… Read more »
As most of you know I have long since been a believer in “YOU CAN PICK YOUR FAMILY”. I spend a great deal of time and energy listening to the bullshit and babblings of the crazy white trash that happens to share my family tree. Well no more. I am kicking those crazy fuckers out of the tree. They can… Read more »
It is a little after 9 p.m. as I sit here … the hum of the fish tank, the light of the moon, the repetition of the dog breathing at my feet comfort me … I miss my best friend. Sometimes I wake up and look, only to find an empty pillow, forgetting he isn’t here … I mark the… Read more »
It is raining in Carlsbad night now … I can almost smell it. I miss that open sky where you can watch the storm roll in for hours before it gets there. I hated the reason WHY I had to be back in the desert- but I didn’t hate the desert. Sometimes I miss it. But then again I am… Read more »
My dad was not my father. It didn’t matter to him or to me that we were not bound by genetics. He did all of the things that the man I thought was my biological father couldn’t or wouldn’t. All of my life I had questions about my father. There was a man that everyone told me was my father,… Read more »
My mom died 5 February 2002. Time has passed and some wounds have healed, some have just gone numb. Getting on with life has gotten a little easier, but last night for the first time in a long time I really missed her. I missed her so much I couldn’t sleep. My mom and I had this weird relationship. When… Read more »
If I ever write a book about my family I am going to call it “Two Tanks of Gas and a Handful of Xanax” – because that is what you need to get through a weekend with them. It isn’t that I despise the whole family thing – just a few of them. They seem to make the visits stressful… Read more »