TBT – 1999

I have been thinking a lot about where my life would be and what it would be like. I would be doing research on a car for my soon to be 16 year old son. It is strange because I consider myself to be childfree and I always have, except for that blip in time. That moment when I felt movement and realized planned or not I was going to be a mother. Then just as I got used to the idea it was taken away – like some sort of cruel game of gotcha.

My dreams and my hopes for him, for us. Gone. Guilt for not wanting to be pregnant, sorrow for all of the what ifs to come.


This is the only picture I have of him.

Kalehn Nikolas Kidd
03 March 1999


This is how I am feeling today. I am tired of people and news and things. I need to unplug and let go.

I am mortified by the overwhelming ignorance that is running rampant in this country and I want to escape to a place of reason and calm.

Stupid people scare the shit out of me, especially the ones that don’t know they’re stupid. When I was 8 my Daddy taught me the difference between ignorant and stupid and I can handle ignorant – as long as there is a will to understand – but STUPID there is just no need for it.

Figgies & Jammies

I have had Pamela’s Products before and enjoyed them and I had been on the lookout for the Figgies & Jammies Cookies. Not having any luck in local shops I broke down and ordered a case of them from Amazon and crossed my fingers.

Yeah, these are keepers. Moist, not too sweet. So tasty.

… you know I will be trying the other flavors!